Walden in Sixth Grade

In Touch With His Soul
An Interview With Walden Welch, An Important American Psychic
By Gina Cerminara
~ Part Four ~

The Librarian

WW: "It was my grandmother who first phoned us with the news that my mother had survived her heart surgery. Grandma phoned at 1:30 PM that afternoon. The doctor phoned with his report much later that day. Waiting seemed an eternity." 

Dr: "I can well imagine the anxieties everyone was going through."

 WW: "The Martins had fibbed to me regarding the hour Mom's surgery was to begin. It was not to be conducted at 9:00 AM as they had told me. In truth, it was scheduled for 5:00 AM, but they were hoping it would be all over by the time they led me to believe it was to begin."

Dr: "To spare you the pain of waiting and worrying no doubt?"

WW: "Yes, of course. They lied out of kindness, as they were very protective of me. Obviously, they underestimated the time the surgery would take. In fact it took five hours plus before Mom was transferred into the intensive care unit."

Dr: "I assume your grandmother waited several hours before phoning you so as to be certain that Julia's condition was stable?"

WW: "Yes, she did, but she and Dr. Gabode both made it clear that Mom would be considered to be in critical condition and in intensive care for several days. We were told not to be overly optimistic that she would pull through. What I was not told, and I wasn't made aware of this fact until three months after her surgery, was that Mom died on the operating table at 5:30 AM. Her heart stopped functioning for almost three minutes. Then, quite miraculously, no sooner had Dr. Gabode pronounced her 'dead', her heart started beating again. During this lapse of life Mom had a 'Near Death Experience', which would forever change both her concepts of life as well as her belief regarding life after death. Considering the fact that Julie was raised Catholic and held devotedly to the concepts of this religion, I find that her personal death experience is remarkable in that what she encountered and related to me adheres more to the 'Judgment Day' Readings of the great seer Edgar Cayce than those given by priests or scholars, or that which is given in the Catholic Religion's description of Purgatory."

Dr: "Judgment day, the day we are judged and sentenced for our sins?"

WW: "Yes.  According to the material given by Edgar Cayce, the star Arcturas, commonly called The North Star, is the location where the soul visits immediately following death, or after having completed one's earth life experience. Cayce stated that the Egyptians were aware of this fact and that is the reason all pyramids were designed with the tops of their structures aligned to point to the star Arcturas. Cayce went on to explain that what the Catholic Church calls 'Purgatory' is in truth called 'The Akashic Records' and, oftentimes, referred to as 'The Great Library' or 'The Hall of Records' and also 'The Book of Life'. This realm is, says Cayce, 'An enormous library where "The Books of Souls Remembrances" are all kept and stored.' These books are individual logs of each and every soul created; a record of every event, day and deed, good or bad, that each and every soul entity has created in her or his lifetime, and past lifetimes as well. These histories are so extensive in detail that even 'each hair and mole upon the body is recorded', says Cayce. The Akashic Records ö or Book of Life ö is the storehouse of all information for every individual who has ever lived upon the earth, containing every word, deed, feeling, thought, and intent that has ever occurred."

Dr: "I am, of course, well versed in the Cayce concepts regarding 'The Akashic Records', but would appreciate your evaluation as to how his, Cayce's, interpretation of 'Judgment Day' differs from those as presented by the Catholic and other faiths."

WW: "There is a beautiful and remarkable difference between the material Cayce gives versus that which other religions present. Cayce presents none of the 'Hell, Fire and Damnation' concepts traditional religions usually throw at us. According to Cayce, 'In the kingdom of God there is only "good", "bad" does not exist within that realm.' Because of this, our 'bad deeds' are never referred to during our time of judgment. Cayce also states, 'God judges the heart and not the deed.' It is only from the intentions of one's heart that we are judged, not by our mere actions alone. He also suggests that, in truth, it is ourselves who judge ourselves when all information is reviewed."

Dr: "Could you present an example to better clarify this please?"

WW: "Let's say that two lovers have a quarrel. He says to her, 'I do not love you anymore. I have never really loved you. I feel I have wasted several years of my life by being with you. I'm still in love with my ex-wife. I always have been in love with her and I want to try going back and working things out with her.' She replies, 'Then go back to her! Go to hell for all I care! I hate you and despise you. Just to have to touch me sickens me. I have never loved you either. I'm glad you're getting out of my life and I hope you drop dead because you deserve to!' No sooner has she finished her words than suddenly he clenches his chest, suffers a heart attack and falls to the floor dead. What was she really saying when she wished him dead? Was it the intention of her heart to wish him to die? Or, inwardly was she just covering her hurt feelings and protecting her pride? Were her harsh words a cover up for her broken heart? Had she told the truth would her words have been, 'I'm devastated! I love you so much. I don't know how I can live without you? Please, I beg you, don't leave me!' However, due to the fact his words were so final, it was no doubt the protecting of her pride that she chose to cover her true feelings from him and retaliate with words of indifference and hostility. So, you see, she was not responsible for his death for that was not the true intention within her heart. There was no truth in the hard and angry self-defensive words she chose to use. Her karmic consequences may be to suffer the lessons of vanity, pride or even anger, but certainly not to suffer the extreme karmic consequences for the greater sin of murder, for murder was not the intention within her heart. This is what Cayce implied when he stated, 'God judges the heart and not the deed.' Is this not a more compassionate and fair judgment than what our modern day forms of Christianity and Judaism lead us to believe?"

Dr: "It is indeed."

WW: "My mother's near death experience adheres greatly to the information which Cayce gave regarding what might be called the 'Judgment Day' experience. In that Julie was a Roman Catholic, what she experienced of her visit to purgatory was not what she would have been taught to expect. Therefore, I find her extraordinary experience to be a validation that the information Cayce gave was indeed truth. Also remember that when Cayce was questioned as to how he received the information he gave in his psychic readings, he stated that he read the information from one's 'Book Of Soul's Remembrances' which he viewed from 'The Great Library' or 'The Akashic Records Library.'

"Now I am going to share with you exactly what Mom said occurred during her short experience with death."

Dr; "Please do. If possible, please word her experience as if you were she telling it so as not to in anyway cloud the information."

WW: "Fine. She related her experience to me many, many times so I can retell it verbatim.

"I found myself wandering aimlessly along several corridors of an enormous library and wondering what I was doing here or how I got here. It was a beautiful building. The floors seemed to radiate with light. They appeared to have been made from white marble, but I could not really tell because they shimmered with light, a light that changed colors, colors I had never seen before. I thought maybe I was walking on 'The Northern Lights' of which I had seen pictures. I was so amazed by the radiant colors too beautiful to describe. As I looked around, I could see there were shelves stacked with books in all directions around me, thousands and thousands of books as far as my eyes could see. I looked up to see the ceiling, but there did not seem to be one. The shelves of books seemed to tower endlessly upward, deep into infinity. I knew I was lost in some kind of maze and I kept following hallways of bookshelves trying to find a way out. I stopped for a moment and tried reading the titles of some books. They all seemed to be bound in the same maroon colored binding and all had gold lettering. I was puzzled as to why the books did not have titles. Each one I looked at had a different person's name, names of people I had never heard of. I was also curious as to why they were also dated. I recall reading two covers, Jonathan Randall Holmes, 1811-1877, and Charlotte Carolyn Dupont, 1855-1911. Then it occurred to me that these books must be the biographies of peoples lives, because they were dated in much the same way as headstones in a cemetery. Some books were very thick while others were narrow. Then I realized that the longer the date was in years so was the size of the book. Naturally the book was thicker if the person had lived longer. Finally, I came to the end of a corridor. There before me was a huge oblong room and it, too, was walled with countless bookshelves. Down at the far end of this room I saw a very large walnut colored desk. Behind the desk stood a tall, thin, white haired man standing with his back towards me. He was very busy arranging books on the shelves in front of him. Thinking he must be the librarian, I walked slowly towards him across the great sized room. There was no one else present so I called out to him, 'Hello? Mr. Librarian? Excuse me, could you possible help me? I'm lost and cannot find my way out of here.' I was half way across the room when he turned around to face me. He waved at me to acknowledge that he had heard me and, with a motion of his hand, he beckoned me to come to him. Suddenly, I was standing directly in front of him on the opposite side of his desk. I was astonished at how tall and thin he was, yet his features were remarkably handsome. He had stunning eyes, kind and caring eyes; they were so penetrating and hypnotic that I cannot recall what color they were. He smiled at me as if he knew me, but I was certain I had never seen him before. 'You must be the librarian,' I asked. 'My name is Julia Foss and I seem to be lost. I don't know where I am or how I got here.' 'Yes, I know who you are. I have been waiting for you,' he replied. His words astonished me because his lips did not move while he spoke yet I heard his voice speak clearly in my head. I wondered how in the world he did that and how he could be expecting me since I did not know him. Confused, I replied, 'Please, Sir, I need your help. I seem to be lost and don't know my way out of here or how I got here. Can you please direct me to the exit door so I can go home?' Still smiling, he said to me, 'Yes, you know where you are. You have died and this is where you are to be.' 'But I am NOT dead!' I replied, confused and somewhat angry. 'I am very much alive. How can you tell me I am dead when I very well know I am not?' The librarian turned towards the bookshelf behind him and removed a book and placed it on the desk in front of me. The book had my name on its cover except it did not say Julia Foss, it read 'Julia Ann Cardoza, April 17, 1916.' 'Please read this.' he asked. As I opened the book, it appeared to come alive with moving color pictures, pictures of my life and of every moment I had ever lived. It was just like watching a motion picture of every day and event of my life, from the day I was born up until the present. It appeared to all happen in what seemed like a second in time. I felt everything I had ever felt all over once again, joy, sorrow, happiness and pain. I regret to say that I was ashamed of much of what I saw about myself, the things I had done, what I wish I had done. I looked up into the face of the librarian thinking he could see my shame. He read my thoughts clearly and said kindly, 'It's not for me to judge. I do not know your story. Only you and God do.' Next, he asked me to follow him. We walked until we stopped before a huge door. The librarian turned to me and said, 'If you enter this door, this is what you shall see.' He slowly opened the door. From behind it I could hear the most gloriously beautiful music one could imagine hearing. It sounded as if a choir of angels, thousands of angels, was singing. It was so lovely I could not help but cry from the beauty of it. I also heard chimes. It sounded as if millions of wind chimes were orchestrated with the voices. The music was too beautiful, too heavenly, to describe. As the door opened fully a great white light, as white as a diamond, radiated from the other side. Standing in the midst of the light was my Grandfather Pereira and my little dog, Betsy. Both of them had died long, long ago and I was amazed to see them both alive again. I felt such love for them that I wanted to lurch through the doorway and hug and kiss them both, yet somehow I knew that if I entered the doorway I would not be able to return. All of a sudden I heard several voices calling my name, 'Hello Julie! We have missed you Julie.' The voices all seemed so familiar, yet I did not recognize any one of them. I stood peering into the light to try and see who they were that were calling me, but the light was so brightly intense that I could only see shadowy silhouettes without faces. I sensed that the voices came from aunts and relatives of mine who had died. There was such an indescribable feeling of love all about. It came from behind the entrance to this doorway and I decided to enter. Once again the librarian read my thought. Before I could make my entrance he said to me, 'Before you do so, I want you to look beyond this other doorway. This is what you will see.' Another door, this one to his right, opened. I hesitated, then cautiously walked to it to look inside. From the moment it began to open I sensed energy of such sadness and grief that I was afraid at first to look. The librarian sensed my fear, this I knew, then took my hand and led me in front of the open door and said, 'Before you decide to join the others, you must look here too, then you must decide between the two. Then you must choose.' As we stood before the door, he turned his back towards it as if it were not for him to see. I felt energy of sadness as I walked near it to look within. There, as if hidden in a vapor of fog, stood the silhouettes of two men. One was tall; the other seemed to be that of a teenage boy. I felt I knew who they were; that perhaps the boy was Wally, yet I knew this couldn't be because he was only six years old. I peered as hard as I could to try to view the faces on the figures but they would not come into focus. I watched as the two figures appeared to kneel; then I saw a silhouette of a pyramid or was it perhaps a tree? Two small ball shaped spheres appeared. I felt something about Christmas, but I could not identify what that might be. Although I could not see their faces, I sensed they were both very sad. I wanted to help them. I knew I knew them. They seemed so familiar but I could not, hard as I tried, recognize them. I recall I asked, 'Who are you? How can I help you?', but neither replied. My instinct told me that this was The Door Of Unhappiness and I knew I did not want to enter it, yet somehow I felt guilty that I did not choose to. The librarian turned to me and said, 'And now you must choose.' I replied, 'No, please·you choose for me.' 'Oh, no. I cannot do that for you. It is you that must choose,' he answered. I knew without question that I wanted to choose the door with the music and people I had once known, for instinct told me that was The Door Of Happiness; yet I felt I would be selfish to do that. I had something to finish, but I did not know what that was. I felt it would be wrong for me not to choose the door with the two sad figures within. Reluctantly, I said to the librarian, 'I'll choose this door.' 'So be it!' He replied

"That was all Mom could recall of the experience. She said that the next memory she had was of becoming conscious in the intensive care unit of the hospital a few days later. It was then that she was told she had died on the operating table and was revived."

The View From Door Number Two

Dr: "What an enthralling example of purgatory! I am moved beyond words! You are so right, your mother's experience indeed parallels the Edgar Cayce Readings of The Akashic Records Library. I have both heard and read of other remarkably similar, if not exact, depictions regarding The Library. Now, tell me please·did Julie ever come to know who the two figures were beyond the door?"

WW: "Yes, but I can't reveal that to you now because it would be out of sequence of my story."

Dr: "Damn you, Walden! (Laugh) What a terrible tease you are. Very well, I will trust you to share the revelation as you come to it. Now please go on with your story. Let's go back to your stay with your grandparents."

WW: "Very well, although there really isn't anything of great importance to relate during that time period. Mom's surgery must have been in June, for I was to spend the entire summer with my grandparents and Marilyn at their farm in Tracy. I was not to see Mom again until September when school started. Her heart surgery recuperation was to require a full three-month hospital confinement. Needless to say it was a painful summer for me for I missed her desperately. I recall that I took one of her small bottles of My Sin perfume with me so that I could sniff it as a reminder of her odor. My favorite aunt, Marie, and her three children were also living with us. Her daughter, Karen, was my age and also my favorite cousin. She would dab a bit of Mom's perfume behind an ear and let me smell her. She'd say, 'Pretend I'm Aunt Julie, ok? Smell me and you won't miss her so much.' Her younger two brothers, Bobby and Gary, would help me keep watch for any cars that might be traveling down the long dirt road towards or house. 'I think it's Julie! I think its Julie!' they would call out with hopes of giving me hope. Each night Grandma would set one extra place setting at the table, 'Just in case Julia happens to come home tonight.' I reveled in Grandma's daily tidbits of wisdom. 'What's fair for one is fair for the other,' she would say. 'You're as good as anyone, but better than none.' 'Share and share alike.' Despite her insistence we were all equal and she showed no partiality towards any of us, I knew in my heart she loved Marilyn and me above the others. They were all so caring and kind to me. Although my grandparents' alfalfa and egg farm was very large and there was always so much work for my grandparents to do, Grandpa would not allow us kids to help him with any chores. This amazed me considering I was well equipped to do anything he was capable of, due to Guy's training. Naturally, I offered to help, but Grandpa would say, 'Kid's are to be kid's. No, you're a good boy, but you play. There is plenty of time to work in the years ahead.' Grandpa's Portuguese accent was so thick we could rarely understand him, yet the kindness and love he felt for me could never be described in any words of any language anyway. They just don't have enough people like my grandparents in this world anymore.

Walden's Grandparents

"So Marilyn, my cousins and I played away summer. We swam in the endless irrigation ditches throughout the farm, played with our five wild cats, made up all kinds of games, which made the summer pass faster. Marilyn was five years older than Karen and I and, therefore, 'the boss'. Naturally, she acted more adult and, therefore, rarely played in our games. However, she was always making French fries for us, feeding us candy, and telling us what to do and not do. She had a quick temper. It didn't take much to tease her into a rage, so naturally we tormented her as much as we could. We pretended she was our enemy but in truth we all loved her dearly. Although she was heavyset, she was absolutely beautiful. Some nights she would let me sleep in her bed. She would cuddle with me all night, wear a splash of My Sin because she knew that reminded me of Mom, and give me kisses whenever we woke, then go around bossing me for the rest of the day. I wished I could be like her. She had a great sense of 'self' and confidence; really 'knew who she was.' She was born on December 25^th; a Capricorn like me, but her Moon was in Leo thus giving her a sense of pride and independence that I would never know. I always felt very protected by her, but wished she were my age so we could know each other better. Five years difference in age creates a barrier in communications when one is young. In that Karen was my age, we bonded together closer than Marilyn and I. I had always wanted a sister, and for that summer Karen fulfilled that need in my heart. It felt nice not being 'the only child' for a change. It was far less lonely being surrounded by others. Despite my loneliness for Mom, this was to be my happiest time, and all of childhood I would ever know. Naturally, I missed Brutus and my friend Joanie, but Grandma would let me phone her once a week."

Dr: "Brutus? You haven't mentioned him before. Who was Brutus?"

WW. (Laugh) "Hadn't I mentioned Brutus? He was my dog. No, actually he was Guy's dog before Mom and I arrived but he soon became mine. He was a big, wonderful, mangy Airedale. We had a certain 'love connection', which was unconditional. My heart still tugs when I think about him. He and Ladybug were my first two dogs. They both lived with Guy when Mom and I arrived, but Ladybug died soon after. Guy accidentally ran over her with his car. Maybe I should add this? The first time I ever astral projected was over Ladybug."

Dr: "You mean an 'Out Of Body' experience?"

WW: "Yes. That happened to me several times when I was a boy. It usually occurred during emotionally upsetting times. No, it only occurred during emotionally upsetting times."

Dr: "I'd be more than interested in you sharing these 'out of body' experiences. Your first was over a situation involving your dog?"

WW: "Yes. It must have been shortly after Mom married Guy, within the first year. Ladybug was a black Cocker Spaniel. Both she and Brutus were Guy's dogs. They both had doghouses in the back yard. I wanted them to live in the house with us but he forbid that. Ladybug became pregnant. Of course, I knew nothing about this process at the time so Mom explained it to me. I don't think I really understood anything she said about the reproductive processes, but I was so excited to hear that it all meant Ladybug was going to have puppies! I would actually sneak out of the house at night and sleep in the doghouse with her; keep her covered with a blanket·that sort of thing. One morning I woke up with her and lying beside me were Ladybug and four puppies! I was so happy I ran into the house and woke Mom and Guy to give them the wonderful news. Mom came out into the backyard with me and we fed Ladybug some warm milk. I must have sat there all morning watching her nurse her litter. I think this was the most exciting day I had ever had. Several weeks later, when the puppies were nearly weaned, I was out collecting eggs in the hen house when Guy called to me to come to him. I went into the pump house to see what he wanted. He had a large tub of water in which he was drowning my puppies. I stood there totally stunned; then I recall I started screaming, over and over as loud as I could."

Dr: "Where was your mother?"

WW: "She wasn't home. She must have been out shopping or something. I know she wasn't there at this time.

"There were three dead puppies in the tub. Guy handed me the fourth one and said; "Now you do it. Hold him under the water. I'm going to make a man out of you. We can't keep all these dogs." The next thing I recall was that I was in Sue's kitchen across the street. She was drinking coffee and reading a magazine. I kept screaming, 'Sue, help me! He's killing my puppies! Make him stop!' Then I became aware that she couldn't see or hear me. I kept screaming louder, but she wasn't aware I was there. Suddenly, I was back in the pump house. I was lying on the floor. Guy was shaking me to make me wake up. I guess I had fainted."

Dr: "With good cause! My Dear Lord·what a horrifying thing to be put through."

WW: "Yes. I would really rather not talk about this. Any possibility of a loving relationship with Guy was forever severed with that happening. He killed all four of my puppies. I never felt a thing for him again."

Dr: "I hate to ask you this, but do you think he forced you to drown the puppy? Is this why you left your body?"

WW: "No. I could not have done that. I fainted so I wouldn't be forced to do that. He tried to make me cut the head of a chicken once, and the same thing happened."

Dr: "You fainted and then left your body?"

WW: "Yes, the exact same thing occurred, only I was standing across the yard watching him shake me back to consciousness. I just couldn't kill a chicken. He started beating me because I refused to chop its head off so I fainted and then stepped out of my body and watched me lying there on the ground."

Dr: "Did these 'out of body' experiences frighten you?"

WW: "Not at all. I think I thought they were natural. I didn't know they didn't happen to other people, too. I guess I thought it was a wonderful thing that happened to you when you didn't want to have to do something awful."

Dr: "Like being forced to kill an animal?"

WW: "Yes, or being whipped too hard. Sometimes when Guy would do that to me, I would find myself standing outside of my body and, therefore, would escape from the pain.

"Good Lord! (Laugh) If you print this some people are going to think I'm a schizophrenic!"

Dr: "I'm sure our readers are aware of the phenomena of 'out of body' experiences. They are not all that uncommon. Unfortunately, those who are unaware of such occurrences might think otherwise. There are thousands of documented cases of 'out of body' experiences which have been reported by totally sane persons I assure you."

WW: "Yes, I know. However, anyone who hasn't experienced this for themselves could never fully understand the reality of the phenomena."

Dr; "Thank you so much for sharing this experience. Sad though it is it adds to my awareness of your psychic nature and is therefore very valuable for your profile.

"Now, you mind if we go back to the time you left your grandparents' home and returned to yours?"

WW: "Yes, of course. I'm sorry I'm confusing this interview by putting events out of sequence. Where were we before I told you about my astral projections?"

Dr: "You were telling of when you were leaving your stay with your grandparents. Your mother was home from the hospital and you were going back home."

WW: "Yes, o.k. I remember. But there really isn't much of interest to tell from this point on. Our remaining years in Stockton were just everyday monotonous repetitions of the same daily events.

"The day before I returned home, my grandparents told me not to be upset when I saw that Mom would be confined to a hospital bed that was put in our home. They explained to me that her doctor had discovered she had contacted Rheumatic Fever and that it may be a long while before she would be able to get out of bed or walk again."

Dr: "Thus another segment of The Gypsy's riddle unfolds?

"The worst you shall see will come five plus three

Unable to flee,

A bed and a blanket,

A shroud to thee

White feathers! White feathers! Everywhere!

Tears and sorrow for you, Beware!

Should you survive?"

Dr: "Absolutely not! I find it fascinating. I love solving mysteries."

WW: "Well you're doing a superb job. Yes, this was the period of Mom's life the Gypsy was referring to. Altogether, her bed stay lasted five years and three months. She always told me it was the worst period of her life, just as The Gypsy had said it would be.

End of Part Four

Next: Part Five, Miss Mean Daisy

Top of Page

©2000 Walden Welch. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without the express written permission of Walden Welch is prohibited.